Since I got back from Amsterdam, I have been swamped with school work. I was dreading that first week back… I had a Spanish presentation, an Art History exam and a big Ethics paper due. Lucky for me, my Ethics paper (about Ethical Egoism) and Spanish presentation (about Feminist Literature and the piece “Tango” by Luisa Valenzuela) were both delayed a week, so I had a bit more time to prepare for each of them. But still, that is a lot crammed into two weeks (on top of all of the regular work, too)! On Thursday as I submitted my Ethics paper it felt like a HUUUGE weight was being lifted…. Only for me to remember 30 seconds later that finals are just around the riverbend (as Pocahantas would say). I still have big exams in every class, a Music research paper and need to squeeze in two concerts and write reviews on them… Yuck.
This will be my 8th round of college finals and it seems so different than any other time. First of all it’s my last round (at least of undergrad), but secondly and most importantly, it means that my time in Spain is coming to an end SOON. I try not to think about it too much, but lately I have been having departure related dreams every night. The first one was really creepy because it was the same as a reoccurring dream I used to have before I CAME to Spain. It used to be that I got to Spain and forgot a bunch of things I wanted, but now it was that I got home and left half of my things in Spain. It makes me think that I’m having the same kind of anxieties about going home as I was about coming here in the first place. And, the other night I dreamt that I woke up the morning I leave at 8:30am (my flight leaves at 11 something) and I didn’t have any of my stuff packed yet. And this morning when I woke up, before I opened up my eyes, I thought I was in my bedroom at home for a second. It has been really weird- and it always makes me wake up feeling nervous. It’s crazy that things I don’t even think about during the day creep out of my subconscious while I’m sleeping. I wish I were a pro dream interpreter so I could decode the meanings :)